Hishamuddin Rais in Tokyo: Sushi News 8

October 30, 2007 5:06:30 PM GMT+08:00

I was bored of TOKYO ‚Äì Shinjuku (Bukit Bintang), Harajuku (Central Market), Reponggi (Bangsar) and Asakusa (Petaling Street) ‚Äì actually a poor and not-so-precise comparisons but to give my Melayu readers some idea of Tokyo ‚Äì so that with Malaysia Boleh spirit you all could twist’n’shout claiming the Japs copied us after they came to Tanah Melayu in 1941) ‚Äì ahah ahah.

Last weekend Рon a bloody rainy, windy and very wet day – we took off to Izu Peninsula – 6 hours drive from Tokyo – we took off just after two from Tokyo Рon the 4-wheel drive was Oto San, a friend of Latiff’s wife friend, Latiff’s sister in law, another Mak Cik Jepun, Latiff and I . The drive is not so memorable due to heavy rain. I could see nothing.

Then we stop at RR for quick lunch (ni macam berhenti Plus RR kat Kuala Kangsar) wow! To my surprise their kedai makan at RR here is a million time better than our Star Hill complex – clean, trendy BUT no SEX.

The journey continues cutting into deep mountains – then along the coast into the Spa area – volcanic hot water spring. At around 6 we checked into the hotel that faced the sea. Guess what – semua kena jadi Jepun – pakai macam Shintaro dan Konga Ninja – only the colour a bit kampong or else I would be a good samurai.

STRANGE HOTEL PROCEDURE HERE – paid NOT by the room but by the head count – so we took 2 rooms Рdinner n breakfast included.

BEFORE DINNER – we were advised to mandi SPA Рha ha ha, my first time in a Japanese public spa – lucky we came late, NOT only one old Jap was there. Anyway I was ready to show my ‘senjata’ to all the Japs so that they would regret ever been born in Japan. Better still if I could venture to the next door where the ladies were lying on the hot natural volcanic h2o. If the ladies were to see my senjata – they will forever regret not having a Melayu as their lover – WELL remember: Size DOES Matter – Never listen to any Gonzilas.

I wanted to ambil gambar – but tak boleh, so there you are – actually I was thinking to have Man jambu, Azim, Izi BUT not Pang (he is a pro) and all the CM pretty boys to be in this spa – teach them a lesson of how to appreciate the male torso.

The h2o was divided into 3 compartments – one very hot, not so hot and another one an open air facing the sea without any glass protection – meaning if you are not in the water the chilly sea breeze might freeze your kontol.

I had a great time – before masuk dalam spa ada ritual Jepun ‚Äì mandi, bersihkan badan dan baru masuk dalam spa ‚Äì hahahah, did I peed in the spa? (I’m NOT telling you) but hot and cold water does wonder to your bladder ‚Äì so next time if anyone ever enter a volcanic spa just try NOT to think about your bladder or do NOT minum beer dulu (I had two can just before entering the hotel ‚Äì my contribution to global warming!!!)

DINNER Рwe are all in samurai costumes – it was a mix buffet – Japanese n Western – a kind of bad Italian spaghetti (just imagine Japanese making roti jala must be bad) I did not even bother to look at the Western menu – I went sushi all the way. Latif was into tempura – poor Latiff, he was putting a ‘show’ of a good mukmin – hahahah – to his newly converted wife.

My BEST SELECTION is fresh red udang – wow – really great with wasabi – Ted, Kecik and Brahim and all the vegans will cry their heart out of missing the pleasure of eating raw animal. ahahah

It was a great dinner – no beer only green Japanese tea – after dinner Tomiko (Latiff’s wife) told us to go again into the spa – according to her it will be good for digestion – well – I was more interested to meander around the hotel – fuck – the Japs is a kind of species that DO NOT know how to have spontaneous fun – suddenly before 9 PM – the whole hotel was quiet – Jesus! It was like tidur kat kubur.

I went out for a walk – the road was deserted – the rain stopped. The wind stopped. I was cruising hoping to meet some Japanese jambus or some mak cik jepun – fuck – none on the road – only a kucing trying to run away from me Рit was a promenade called Tzunami Walk – very beautiful pavement – here I was told the Japs would congregate on 31st December night to watch the SUNRISE Рanother Japanese ritual.

5.45 in the morning – we were awaken by Tomiko from next door – we MUST open the window and watch the SUNRISE – Jesus! Wow! now you knew why Japanese is called the country of the rising sun and Malaysia is called country of the rising son-in–law!

A few miles into the open sea is an island where the sun rises. At around 6.15 AM I could see the yellow sun – it was a beautiful experience – a million times better than taking speed or magic mushroom. This is an experience in a life time – all the balcony was filled with the Japanese in their samurai dressing.

SPA AGAIN – after the sun set – into the spa again – this time the bath was filled with Japs – but I am so proud to announce that Latiff and I at any time could get the gold and silver awards for SIZE – the japs are all kecut and kulup. Even Kecik could anytime gained a bronze – SIZE DOES MATTER!! Do not listen to GONZILLA.

BREAKFAST – I’m not a breakfast person ‚Äì my choice is still Japanese breakfast ‚Äì like nasi air or teow chew porridge with lots of pickles and sea food.

After breakfast we journey into the hilly area – really beautiful Japan Рbut the mountainous (area) is a bit boring – the hutan macam belukar kat belakang Lost Gen – but the view looking at the sea was magnifique!

At around 11 AM we arrived at Ito – a small town – here we booked into a sushi bar – the famous sushi in town – fresh fish and fresh air – this time our sushi came through the escalator – it moves round and round – we just pick and choose what ever we like – it was an experience.

AFTER LUNCH – we journeyed to another town to meet Mimi, a Malaysian lady who had settled this part of Japan – on the way to this town we stumbled into FUJI SAN – wow – this should be the grand finale for any visitor to Japan – it was like meeting god on the road.

Fuji already snow capped – beautiful and magnificent – I do not know how far we were from Fuji but it was worth the journey.

WITH the rising sun and Fuji San I think my journey to Japan should be completed soon ‚Äì but I know I had another month here ‚Äì Latiff left the next day and now I’m back to my room 330 ‚Äì facing my computer.

Cheers – wait for the next SUSHIII news